“But LorD …”

By Dawn M. Frankfurt

Glory to the Holy and Undivided Trinity; God who is Three in One and One in Three;

Who is beyond us, among us, within us;

Who was, and is, and is to come, world without end. Amen.

There were lots of times when I was a kid that I couldn’t wait to be a grown-up. I wanted to make my own decisions and write my own rules. Children, who have everything needed for survival provided for them, yearn for the freedoms like staying up all night if they want to. It seems to kids that adults have it made. Grown-ups get to stay up as late as they want to. Adults have the luxury of making all sorts of rules. Children don’t get this. They want to be able to eat as much candy or dessert as they are able to eat, and they want as many presents as Santa can squeeze down the chimney. Adults look at children and longingly remember when they took naps every afternoon and spent time playing on the playground. Grown-ups remember a time of not having to cook or do laundry. They haven’t forgotten what it was like not having a checking account or credit card debt, and they wish they didn’t know now what high blood pressure and diabetes are.

Growing out of the things that children do, and leaving behind all of the rules that kids must follow, seems to those who don’t know what else comes with these privileges, like it would be heaven on earth when that day finally comes. Adults who have done it, who know they probably won’t get to take a nap today, who still have to figure out what to cook for dinner tonight, and who may even have kids of their own, can look back on childhood and think about it fondly. Grown-ups remember the very few worries they used to have and marvel at how much a couple of quarters used to mean to them. Since then, they’ve had more schooling, lots of job training and years of what they call “life experience.” But I bet you, if every single adult here was given the choice of returning to that carefree time of being twelve years old, or staying at the age they currently are, I would be very surprised if anyone took the offer.

Why is that? Why would anyone choose to live with more responsibilities, more challenges, more obligations, complications, and requirements? Doesn’t having all of that make life harder? Aren’t there times when you want to get away from all of that? Isn’t it preferable not to be caught unprepared and never to make mistakes? Isn’t it easier to do that in simple situations rather than complex ones? If all of that is true, then why do we choose adulthood over childhood? Why do we opt for a life that includes difficulty and disappointment over returning to something safer, more simple, and with compact answers?

Everyone has their own special, specific answer to this. The fact is, being a grown-up can be much more interesting than being a kid. Something comes with challenge, risk, struggle and problems which you don’t get without them. The kind of joy and satisfaction that comes after accomplishing something difficult can never be experienced without enduring the trials and adversities of the task. Unless we’ve run a marathon, we don’t know what it is like to cross the finish line. Unless we’ve survived cancer, we don’t know what gratitude for good health really is. Unless you’ve had un-paid bills hanging over your head, you can’t fully appreciate what it means to be out of debt.

I have an example of something that is worth doing even though it can be hard. Sometimes it is difficult to be a single person owning a dog. If I have to go to Roanoke for the day, who will let the dog out? If I’m called away on an emergency, who can I call to go feed the dog? Who, beside me, worries about a complaint about the dog? Who will help me pay the vet bills? Who will help me make the difficult decisions all pet owners eventually have to make? If I don’t do it, who will sweep the floor and pick up after the dog? There are many things to worry about, lots of expenses and headaches involved in owning a dog – there is no denying that. But the benefits way, way, way out-weigh the cost. I never walk into a dark house alone. There is never a lonely silence. There is always companionship. There is another being who breathes, who has her own personality, who loves and is a member of my family. Abbey is a far greater gift than she is a burden.

I hear parents say this sort of thing about their kids all of the time. Of course they have day to day troubles, and certain petulant stages seem like they will last forever, but I’ve never once heard any parent say that if they had the chance to do it all over again, they wouldn’t have kids. That just doesn’t happen. Somehow, the harder things are, the more investment is demanded from us, the more sweat equity we put into something, then the greater capacity that thing has to grant us a sense of completion, awe, gratitude, happiness, relief and celebration. The joys of parenthood.

Speaking of parents – let’s get back to the story of Joseph. As we heard this morning, Joseph was getting ready to take on some of the responsibilities of adulthood. He’d found a girl he wanted to marry, he was prepared to take her into his household, to take care of her, and to give her food, clothing and shelter. He would also, eventually, be responsible for providing for any children they may have. Joseph was engaged to Mary, but as we know, he discovered that she was pregnant before she became his wife. Joseph did not want to be responsible for a child who was not his. He had started trying to figure out how to get out of the predicament when an angel appeared to him in a dream. Joseph was asked by the angel not to do the easy thing, but to do the hard thing instead. He was asked to stay with Mary. Joseph and Mary were asked to do a far more difficult thing than you or I have ever been asked to do. They were asked to raise the Son of God as a child of their own. Obviously, this was a one-time request, and these were the special people given the opportunity to respond. And we know the story – that by saying “YES” to God’s request, their lives were infinitely harder than they would have been otherwise. In the first days of their child’s life they had to flee to Egypt. This was only one in a life-long string of struggles and difficulties which would come along with being the human parents to the Son of God. In hindsight, though, don’t you think they feel the same way we do, that for the salvation of the world their troubles were worthwhile? God used them in making eternal life possible for everyone.

The choice is up to us. We always have the opportunity to opt for an easy path. We can wade forever in the ankle-deep water of the surf on the beach without ever diving into the ocean. But think of all of the things we miss if we never swim with the ocean floor 100s of feet beneath us. Think of swimming in the vast sea which is home to so many creatures. Of course there are sharks and killer whales, and there are also coral reefs, fluorescent fish, elegant stingrays, breath-taking under-water cliffs and immense expanses of blue water which will never enrich your life while you’re walking on the beach the same way they will if you jump right into them.

The more we learn and understand about life, the more we discover there is to appreciate, to think about and to be enlivened by. The better we get to know people in our lives, the more questions we want to ask them, the more we see that there is more than one way to look at things, and the more we see that our capacity for emotion is greater than we imagined. It works the same way in our faith lives and in our relationship with God. At first, it might seem like knowing the ten commandments and reciting the golden rule are enough. True, they are basic. But think of how much more is in the Bible in addition to that. When scripture presents an idea to us, or life shows us a new situation, we are being given opportunities to grow into a more mature relationship with God. Making spiritual gains, continually changing and expanding the way we understand and relate to God in our lives is hard. We get discouraged, angry, exasperated, confused and we just don’t need the hassle.

It is easier to be a child than it is to be an adult. It is much more simple, and less expensive, not to have a pet. Life could be infinitely less complicated and stressful without kids. … Telling the truth is hard, but it is always worth it. Visiting those who are sick or dying might be trying, but it is always worth it. The more difficult something is, the greater the potential reward it holds. This is encouragement to hang in there in your relationship with God and to keep working on it, keep trying to figure things out. Continue to talk to God, ask questions, doubt, wonder, speculate. There is a promised reward.

When God asks you to do something which seems difficult, think about Joseph. By faith, Joseph knew that responding to God, however outrageous the request, was what he should do. It would have been easier for him to get up in the middle of the night and walk out on Mary and the un-born child. Life wouldn’t have been nearly as hard if he had just said, “NO,” to the angel.

I came across a book this week titled, “But Lord, I Was Happy Shallow!” Reading that, I knew right away that at one time the author had left the safety of childhood and had moved out of the land of inexperience. “But Lord, I Was Happy Shallow!” I guess you can be “happy” if you’re shallow. Maybe things could be easier -- but Lord, they’re so much better this way!!

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

-- Robert Frost

Joseph also took the road less traveled by. May God give us the strength and the will to follow the example in Frost’s poem, to follow the example of Joseph, and most of all, to follow the example of God’s Son, Jesus Christ, who trod the ultimate road not taken – for the whole of humanity.

AMEN!